October 2, 2013
Day 2: The Waiting Test
My mind went blank on me. I've been looking forward to this for about 48 hours now... Seriously, I only found out about this series on Monday. When I went to bed Monday night or when I was working that next morning, I had plenty of ideas floating around in my head about what I should write. But when I sit down and try to put it into words....... the wisps disappear.
Even as I struggle to write this second post for this series, I am reminded to wait. Not to rush into writing what I want to write. But to wait.
To wait on the Lord.
Just take a deep breath.
I have so many things that I could say. I made a list of things that I want to write about this month. But none of them seem right for this moment.
Waiting is hard. I think it's sometimes a test from God to see if we actually trust Him to do what He has promised. How long can we hold out that trust?
I'm going to be very honest here. Before we were married, a couple friend of ours prayed over us and got a word from the Lord that God has given me the gifting to be a great mother, and that some day, in His timing, I will be. That was a promise, right? Josiah and I have been married 4 years. I'm glad that we have waited to have children, but some times that desire comes to the surface, as we get older.
I didn't have the dream to have kids when I was a teenager or going through college, it just wasn't there. But I do now, some days, especially when I see all the cute, wonderful families at church. But for now, we wait.
And where is the joy in that?
It is in the quiet before the cries. It is in the restful nights of sleep that we (usually) get. It is in the continued learning to know who we are as husband and wife. It is in learning who I am, who God created me to be, before the me gets knotted up in the messy joy of family. It is in the learning to see what I have now and enjoying it for the gift that it is, knowing there will be more gifts to come.
To see more posts in this series just click on the label "31 Days" under the title of each post in this series, or go back to Day 1 here and choose from the list of days listed at the bottom of the post.