This morning brought me to an unexpected joy in a chore that I usually take for granted.
I realized that I love to wash the dishes by hand (I am still thankful for my dishwasher though)! I can look out the window in front of me and watch the bustle of farm life and pray and sing and it is so much fun!
This morning I was blessed to see the beautiful synchronization that can take place with any good team. Josiah on the scraping tractor, Jeremy in the skid-steer, Grandpa on the tractor hauling out the frozen manure and snow from the open barnyard. Everyone doing their part to clean up after Tuesday's snow. It was a beautiful picture. I was thankful to have such a view and be reminded of the wonderful people who work here on the farm. Unity is always a lovely picture.
And it also takes me back to my days working in the kitchen at Black Rock, washing multitudes of dishes in the sink, only to take them back to run through the industrial dishwasher. Those were the good old days! I do miss that sometimes. But I never had as good of a view when I washed dishes as I do now. Every one should have a good view while washing the dishes.
And the warm water with all those bubbles, it's refreshing and cozy on a cold day. The bubbles remind me of bubble fights I had with my roommates at college. Where we would end up on the floor laughing so hard.
Thank you Lord for good memories and gratitude today.
January 23, 2014
January 14, 2014
Dissatisfied
Josiah and I went to see the second part of The Hobbit movie the other evening.
First, Josiah fell asleep. This is normal, and he saw all but the last half hour maybe. So he didn't miss the whole thing.
Secondly, the book is much better. If only they had stuck to the book, but I guess they thought the book wasn't dramatic enough and Smaug needed more lines (among other characters who monopolize the attention away from the true main character, Bilbo Baggins). And why do the dwarves look so goofy? Gimli never looked that goofy in the Lord Of The Rings movies. And really, who would ever believe a love story between a dwarf and an elf? It would never work, now move on to the real story.
And finally, I don't really enjoy watching movies all that much anymore. They leave me dissatisfied. It's what they're meant to do. Leave you hanging by an emotional thread, wanting more so that you come back for the next one in the series, the same goes for a televisions series.
Leaving you dissatisfied with your life, wanting more adventure, more fun, more freedom, more happiness. Always wanting more. More than my busy schedule and tired eyes, more than my messy house, more than my average intelligence and common sense could ever leave me with. Life in the movies always works out, right (It makes me wonder if the final Hobbit movie will follow the book in who dies and who lives in the end?)?
Casting shadows of discontent over my plain, often unglamorous life. Creating discontent and ingratitude. Pulling my eyes and heart down into myself. The places where I can't see all the little miracles and gifts.
I'm reading another Ann Voskamp book this year, One Thousand Gifts. Also, at the beginning of this year, I've started counting my 1000 gifts for her Joy Dare in a lovely journal that I put pictures on the front of (such a fun project!). So far I am finding it easy to find 3 things each day to be grateful for, and some days I don't want to stop, I want to write 10 things down not just 3!
But still, my discontent peeks through. Whenever my plan for the day gets pushed aside for something more pressing. Whenever I am interrupted while writing or reading. Whenever I am forced to be in a rush to go somewhere. Whenever the weather turns cold and white and impedes travel. Then you will see the grumpy, dissatisfied me. The selfishness in me. The things I don't want to be.
And so I keep counting all these every day gifts that God has put right in front of me.
I will learn this, it may take my whole life but I will continue to learn it afresh every day.
First, Josiah fell asleep. This is normal, and he saw all but the last half hour maybe. So he didn't miss the whole thing.
Secondly, the book is much better. If only they had stuck to the book, but I guess they thought the book wasn't dramatic enough and Smaug needed more lines (among other characters who monopolize the attention away from the true main character, Bilbo Baggins). And why do the dwarves look so goofy? Gimli never looked that goofy in the Lord Of The Rings movies. And really, who would ever believe a love story between a dwarf and an elf? It would never work, now move on to the real story.
And finally, I don't really enjoy watching movies all that much anymore. They leave me dissatisfied. It's what they're meant to do. Leave you hanging by an emotional thread, wanting more so that you come back for the next one in the series, the same goes for a televisions series.
Leaving you dissatisfied with your life, wanting more adventure, more fun, more freedom, more happiness. Always wanting more. More than my busy schedule and tired eyes, more than my messy house, more than my average intelligence and common sense could ever leave me with. Life in the movies always works out, right (It makes me wonder if the final Hobbit movie will follow the book in who dies and who lives in the end?)?
Casting shadows of discontent over my plain, often unglamorous life. Creating discontent and ingratitude. Pulling my eyes and heart down into myself. The places where I can't see all the little miracles and gifts.
I'm reading another Ann Voskamp book this year, One Thousand Gifts. Also, at the beginning of this year, I've started counting my 1000 gifts for her Joy Dare in a lovely journal that I put pictures on the front of (such a fun project!). So far I am finding it easy to find 3 things each day to be grateful for, and some days I don't want to stop, I want to write 10 things down not just 3!
But still, my discontent peeks through. Whenever my plan for the day gets pushed aside for something more pressing. Whenever I am interrupted while writing or reading. Whenever I am forced to be in a rush to go somewhere. Whenever the weather turns cold and white and impedes travel. Then you will see the grumpy, dissatisfied me. The selfishness in me. The things I don't want to be.
And so I keep counting all these every day gifts that God has put right in front of me.
I will learn this, it may take my whole life but I will continue to learn it afresh every day.
January 3, 2014
Perspective
These are the hard days. When things don't go as you plan.
It snows and makes the world beautiful, but also makes more work and harder travel. When a night of unexpected work follows a full day, still fighting that nagging cold.
I found myself grumpy, not even wanting any sympathy, but wanting to wallow in my own frustration.
And of course, that's when that one word popped into my head. God reminding me that this one word brings perspective.
Gratitude. How do I be grateful, when I feel so ungracious? How do I surround myself with this word that contains joy and grace, when I can't make myself feel joyful?
I remind myself that I have a place to work and live. That I am grateful to be able to steward this land, for this season that God has allowed. I remember my gratitude for the cows. So many of them I would call friends (it may sound weird to you, but it's true). And they provide us with milk, which makes so many wonderful things (like chocolate and ice cream, 2 of my favorites). And I know that I am grateful that I am able to fill in for many of the jobs on the farm so that Josiah gets some sleep.
So far, bringing this word to mind, has helped me change my perspective in a somewhat frustrating situation. It helped me focus on the positive things that I am thankful for. And from that I was reminded to pray for and into the situations that I am finding difficult. Trusting that out of gratitude, a miracle will come.
It snows and makes the world beautiful, but also makes more work and harder travel. When a night of unexpected work follows a full day, still fighting that nagging cold.
I found myself grumpy, not even wanting any sympathy, but wanting to wallow in my own frustration.
And of course, that's when that one word popped into my head. God reminding me that this one word brings perspective.
Gratitude. How do I be grateful, when I feel so ungracious? How do I surround myself with this word that contains joy and grace, when I can't make myself feel joyful?
I remind myself that I have a place to work and live. That I am grateful to be able to steward this land, for this season that God has allowed. I remember my gratitude for the cows. So many of them I would call friends (it may sound weird to you, but it's true). And they provide us with milk, which makes so many wonderful things (like chocolate and ice cream, 2 of my favorites). And I know that I am grateful that I am able to fill in for many of the jobs on the farm so that Josiah gets some sleep.
So far, bringing this word to mind, has helped me change my perspective in a somewhat frustrating situation. It helped me focus on the positive things that I am thankful for. And from that I was reminded to pray for and into the situations that I am finding difficult. Trusting that out of gratitude, a miracle will come.
January 2, 2014
My Word for 2014
I have decided on my word. For a while there I was wrestling between 2 words. One exciting and something that I want to live into more, the other one, not as exciting and more taken for granted.
It's an everyday thing that I don't do as much as I would like to think. I forget, I grow discontent.
This year, the word that I want to live into, to surround myself with, to live by and focus on every day; that one word is: gratitude.
It's an everyday thing that I don't do as much as I would like to think. I forget, I grow discontent.
This year, the word that I want to live into, to surround myself with, to live by and focus on every day; that one word is: gratitude.
December 31, 2013
One Word For My New Year
It's that time of the year. The end. When everyone gets out their forgotten lists from last year and determines that this will be the year they succeed in making those things happen.
I used to write down all the things that I accomplished in the ending year, and make plans for what I wanted to do in the year ahead. But in the last few years, life has been so much up-in-the-air that I haven't done any of that. How could I make plans when I didn't know what the next day would hold?
I still don't know what tomorrow will hold, and I'm probably not going to make any New Year's Resolutions. They are just too easy to break anyway.
Instead, this year I am going to choose just one word.
If I had done this for 2013, I think my word would have been "Waiting." It seemed to be a theme for this past year. But of course, that's hindsight. I wouldn't have chosen that word for 2013, that just seems to be what it turned out to be.
So happy New Year (a little early, at least in this time zone)! May you feel the love of God warming your heart in this coming year and every day!
I used to write down all the things that I accomplished in the ending year, and make plans for what I wanted to do in the year ahead. But in the last few years, life has been so much up-in-the-air that I haven't done any of that. How could I make plans when I didn't know what the next day would hold?
I still don't know what tomorrow will hold, and I'm probably not going to make any New Year's Resolutions. They are just too easy to break anyway.
Instead, this year I am going to choose just one word.
"One word that sums up who you want to be or how you want to live. One word that you can focus on every day, all year long." -One Word 365I saw this on someone's blog and thought it was a great idea. And I like words, so it felt like a good fit for me. I'm still struggling with what my word should be, but I have it narrowed down to just a few. So by tomorrow, I hope to start writing about and around and into my word.
If I had done this for 2013, I think my word would have been "Waiting." It seemed to be a theme for this past year. But of course, that's hindsight. I wouldn't have chosen that word for 2013, that just seems to be what it turned out to be.
So happy New Year (a little early, at least in this time zone)! May you feel the love of God warming your heart in this coming year and every day!
What I learned in December
I can't believe how long this month has felt! Normally, December speeds by so fast that I can't believe it's over so soon, but not this year.
Some of the random things that I learned this month.
1. I now remember why I didn't like playing my flute in front of people. I get so nervous and my face gets bright red and super warm. I don't know what makes the guitar different, but I don't get as nervous with the guitar... at least I haven't yet.
2. Advent means coming.
3. The squiggly part on the back of my dustpan is used to clean the brush off. Josiah told me to wipe off the broom, so I started wiping it off with my little brush and then he showed me how to wipe it off with the dustpan! Josiah is better at housekeeping than I am!
4. I saw my first breach birth. I didn't know calves could be born that way. I'm still learning about this farming thing.
5. According to a soon(ish)-to-be doctor, 100% of Vietnamese people are lactose intolerant. That is so hard for me to believe!
6. You can get a paper cut on your tongue.
7. I do not have the gift of being able to communicate well with people who do not speak English very well (English is not their first language). Josiah has gotten very good at it though.
8. Apparently (again, according to an almost-doctor and almost-nurse), when you are outside on a cold day, your body uses up your energy to try to stay warm so it can't fight off sickness as well. Therefore I got a cold.
9. I saw my first sun pillar. At least I saw it for the first time, and I actually realized what I was seeing/what it was called.
I'm sure there were so many other things that I learned this month, but at the moment, I can't remember! If I don't write them down right away I tend to forget them.
Linking up with Emily Freeman at Chatting At The Sky.
Some of the random things that I learned this month.
1. I now remember why I didn't like playing my flute in front of people. I get so nervous and my face gets bright red and super warm. I don't know what makes the guitar different, but I don't get as nervous with the guitar... at least I haven't yet.
2. Advent means coming.
3. The squiggly part on the back of my dustpan is used to clean the brush off. Josiah told me to wipe off the broom, so I started wiping it off with my little brush and then he showed me how to wipe it off with the dustpan! Josiah is better at housekeeping than I am!
4. I saw my first breach birth. I didn't know calves could be born that way. I'm still learning about this farming thing.
5. According to a soon(ish)-to-be doctor, 100% of Vietnamese people are lactose intolerant. That is so hard for me to believe!
6. You can get a paper cut on your tongue.
7. I do not have the gift of being able to communicate well with people who do not speak English very well (English is not their first language). Josiah has gotten very good at it though.
8. Apparently (again, according to an almost-doctor and almost-nurse), when you are outside on a cold day, your body uses up your energy to try to stay warm so it can't fight off sickness as well. Therefore I got a cold.
9. I saw my first sun pillar. At least I saw it for the first time, and I actually realized what I was seeing/what it was called.
10. Leg wrestling, like arm-wrestling. It exists. It looks a little bit like this, but I couldn't get a good shot because Kristen didn't even last 1 second when the battle began!
I'm sure there were so many other things that I learned this month, but at the moment, I can't remember! If I don't write them down right away I tend to forget them.
Linking up with Emily Freeman at Chatting At The Sky.
December 25, 2013
Merry Christmas!
"The Savior—yes, the Messiah, the Lord—has been born today in Bethlehem, the city of David! And you will recognize him by this sign: You will find a baby wrapped snugly in strips of cloth, lying in a manger.”
Suddenly, the angel was joined by a vast host of others—the armies of heaven—praising God and saying,
“Glory to God in highest heaven,
and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.”
and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.”
When the angels had returned to heaven, the shepherds said to each other, “Let’s go to Bethlehem! Let’s see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”
They hurried to the village and found Mary and Joseph. And there was the baby, lying in the manger. After seeing him, the shepherds told everyone what had happened and what the angel had said to them about this child. All who heard the shepherds’ story were astonished, but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often." -Luke 2: 11-19
Christmas has come finally!
But now that it's almost over, wait, don't rush to the next thing. Life isn't in the rush and the commotion. Life is in the small, life-giving things, like the Baby we celebrate on this day. In the bustle and fast forward speed of life, it is easy to forget the truly important, small and beautiful gifts that God gives us every day.
I feel like I'm back at the beginning of this Advent. Taking slow breaths. Taking time, waiting. Maybe every day should be like this Advent. A reminder that God is with us. God is for us. And God always comes for us. In our lowest moments, He comes to us and offers us the greatest gift. Himself.
Every day He is coming. Every day is advent.
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| Sunset from this beautiful Christmas evening |
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